The Law of Attraction suggests that ‘energy flows where attention goes’, and that we can energetically create circumstances based on our where we focus our attention. Enlightenment is said to be achievable through detachment and compassion, however enlightenment does not need to be a mystical concept. I like to see it as a way of bringing ‘light’ to the ‘darkness’ within, or understanding the inner workings of our minds and all of our programming. By ‘shining light’ on ourselves we have the ability to live a life that is not driven by subconscious fear. All our fear based emotions and beliefs are just old programming that weigh us down, by understanding our own fears we allow them to surface in order to be understood and cleared. We go into a more ‘child-like’ fearless state…with the added advantage of wisdom that comes with maturity. Perfect balance I’d say!
Below is a series of questions to ask yourself in order to understand yourself better. The trick is to say or write down the very first thoughts that come up. This will help you to understand where you are injecting negative attention in your life and where you are injecting positive. The awareness these questions bring, may help you to redirect your energy in a way that will positively benefit you. You can’t change what you don’t recognise – these questions may help you to recognise your patterns of thinking and therefore recognise what you can and can’t change. Through self awareness and observation we can understand where we are wasting energy, where it would be better utilised and what we are attracting.
I will hand it over to Bruce Lee to summarise:
“Absorb what is useful, discard what is not and add what is uniquely your own”
So ask yourself the following questions and think or write down the first thing that comes up:
1. In your primary relationship, where is your attention? What Kind of Energy are you generating? Love or Fear?
2. What are you attracting in your career and level of success? Explore your energy and attention.
3. What are you attracting/where is your energy and attention, in your relationships with family and friends?
4. What are you attracting in regard to your health?
Meditate upon any changes that you need to make. Where can you inject more positive energy?
What you desire you also fear, they go together, hand in hand. So ask yourself some questions regarding your desires:
5. Meditate on something you desire and then find the fear that accompanies your desire.
6. Explore the different ways you can respond to the desire – your potential choices.
7. If you are considering the pursuit of a desire, which RISK applies to you the most if the desire was not fulfilled: loss of love, loss of control or loss of self esteem?
8. What is the clear purpose of your desire?
9. If you attempt to fulfil your desire – what is the best that could happen if things work out in your favour?
10. What is the worst that could happen?
11. Is the potential loss of not fulfilling your desire greater than the possible gain?
12. Who else would like to see you fulfil your desire? Does this drive your desire?
13. Who would prefer you did not fulfil your desire? Does this drive your desire?
14. If you are afraid of fulfilling your desire – what is holding you back?
15. Would your fulfilled desire be a growth step that would improve the quality of your life?
N.B. If you are going to act upon your desire, do not wait for the perfect moment as it seldom arrives, make a decision and start creating your own reality.
Your ‘IF ONLY’s’:
We become detached when we do not become emotionally attached to outcomes and expectations that are out of our control, especially when it comes to the past. These ‘if only’ moments consume our energy and prevent us from feeling liberated and focussed. Here are some examples of our ‘if only’s’:
“If only I found my soul mate, I would be more happy”
“If only I made more money, I would be more happy”
“If only I had more time, I could enjoy my money”
“If only I could lose some weight, I would feel better about myself”
All the ‘if only’s’ will only generate more ‘if only’s’. It is in a switch of mindset (not external circumstances) that we are able to value what we have, which in turn creates more things for us to value! When we focus our attention on the more positive, we generate more of that, and when we focus on our fear based insecurities, we create a negative spiral of thinking and find negative focal points for our attention.
Take some deep breaths and allow quietness of mind to come in before exploring the following:
15. What are your relationship IF ONLY’s?
16. What are your IF ONLY’s when it comes to friends?
17. What are your IF ONLY’s when it comes to family members?
18. What are your IF ONLY’s in regard to what you really want out of life?
19. Do you have any IF ONLY’s about your job?
20. What are your career level and success IF ONLY’s?
21. How many of the above require for someone else to be the way YOU want them to be?
Now, examine all your IF ONLY’s and pick your primary ‘IF ONLY’. Meditate on whether or not this ‘if only’ is draining you of energy and focus. Observe your ‘IF ONLY’s’ next time they surface. By becoming aware you can detach from your negative programming.
Useful tip: Next time you recognise that you are resisting life as it is and ‘what is’, find the ‘if only’. This will help you to detach quite quickly and move on!
What pushes your buttons?
To explore our programming, fear based conditioning and repetitive thought patterns, we must consider how much of our thinking is really OURS and how much of it is imposed. In order to explore this further, ask yourself the following questions:
22. What pushes your buttons causing you to become angry quickly?
23. In your personal life what pushes your buttons and causes you to react with anger, repression or fear?
24. What pushes your buttons at work, that cause you to express fear?
25. What pushes your embarrassment buttons? Are these embarrassment buttons your own or imposed?
26. What public, national or international situations, push your buttons?
27. What does the person closest to you do, to push your buttons?
28. How does what other people think about you, push your buttons?
29. Now think about how what OTHER people think about you is manipulating you. How does what other people think about you cause you to be the way THEY want you to be?
30. How much of your personal power and freedom do you give away by worrying about what other people think over what YOU think?
Answer these questions truthfully without pondering too much over the answers. Once you are done, reflect back and take time to think about how to positively impact your life. Simple observation and self awareness is the key to self mastery followed by strong determined action.
I challenge you to become masterpieces of your own lives!
‘Surrender to what is, let go of what was, have faith in what will be’
(Based on the book ‘The Zen way to attain peace, detachment and program success’ by Dick Sutphen)